The 7 Most Unromantic Gifts

You can't go wrong with flowers, jewelry, or fine chocolate. But some guys miss the mark and buy the 7 most unromantic gifts:

1. A gag gift: A mug with "over the hill" or a tee-shirt that says "You're pretty when I'm drunk," are very unromantic gifts. They will end up in her closet or she will donate them to the rummage sale. Though a sense of humor is great in romance, it can be a dud when it is merely clownish, or makes fun of your lover.

2. Porn is a poor gift choice. It is not something women want to see constantly, and it's definitely not something they want to keep on a shelf with their other DVDs. Seeing amateur actors bumping and grinding on screen is simply not romantic. How much more romantic it would be to set up a cozy dinner and an evening of love-making to music you both enjoy, rather that watching other people performing in front of a camera?

3. A stuffed animal: Flowers are highly romantic. But flowers held by a stuffed pig with a heart on his chest that says "I oink you" is silly and immature. It does not promise to lead to romantic longings--only memories of when she was in junior high.

4. A self-help book: A woman doesn’t want the one she loves to present her with a book that pinpoints problems that she needs to work on. How would you like it if she presented you with a gallon-sized bottle of mouthwash or a bottle of Viagra for your birthday?

5. Gift certificates: They tell the lady, that you know nothing about them. "Here, go and buy yourself something from this store you might like." It also takes about three minutes to buy the gift certificate. Do you really want your girlfriend or wife thinking you spent three minutes on her gift? This also goes for handing her money and saying, "go buy yourself something." It takes no planning and you will lose points in the romance department.

6. Workout clothes: Buying workout gear is like saying: “You need to work on those extra love handles.” Exercise equipment is also one of the least romantic gifts -- ever, for the same reason. Anything that will make her break a sweat is not romantic or think she needs to work on herself because she is not good enough just as she is, is a bad idea.

7. Tools: Work is never romantic. Anything used for manual labor, household items for chores, or products for gardening are all disappointing gifts. Once a friend's husband got her a mop and bucket for their wedding anniversary. Another friend got a power drill for her birthday. Guess who didn't celebrate in bed that night.